


rabie

by manhattans_here



Category: Newsies - All Media Types, Newsies!: the Musical - Fierstein/Menken
Genre: Being me, Decided to write it, M/M, THE RABIES FIC, and i - Freeform, but like it's ralbert so what else could it be, i love it, it's been a while since i wrote something under 1000 words, it's crack, it's incredible, jk he's a bitch baby for other reasons, no one has rabies because i was recently informed that if you get rabies you have four days to live, race is scared of needles cause he's a bitch baby, she has rabies, this was created as an inside joke with the wormsies discord serves, ultimate crackfic, well except from rabie the raccoon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-27
Updated: 2020-12-27
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:21:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 806
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28367574
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/manhattans_here/pseuds/manhattans_here
Summary: cute date idea: go get your rabies shots together <3
Relationships: Albert DaSilva/Racetrack Higgins
Comments: 5
Kudos: 11





	rabie

**Author's Note:**

> yes, getting your rabies shots is probably not the first thing you do when you discover a raccoon inside your house but, hey. this is ralbert.

Race remembered many pets he’d owned in the past. There was his childhood dog, Lyra, the hamster he’d gotten in fifth grade, the two cats they’d adopted when he was fifteen and of course, Otis, Albert’s golden retriever who he currently lived with (temporarily called Sock, but that was changed for… reasons). Ever since he was little, he loved all animals, even the ones he wasn’t really supposed to keep in his house. He’d sit and read about all kinds of wild and domestic animals, he found every trait of them interesting, how they’d behave in ways that at first seemed to not make sense to him but slowly, all clicked in place as he saw them interact, create bonds, even simply survive. He loved to observe and learn that human life was never the only life. The raccoon that he’d just now discovered had taken over their basement, though? Wasn’t loving it very much.

Race groaned to himself. Of all things he’d found in that basement, and there had been many questionable ones, this was his least favorite so far. “Albert!” he called out, running up the stairs with a basked of laundry. “Albert, holy fuck.”

“What’s up?” Albert walked in from the kitchen. He was probably doing the dishes, they had decided to try and keep the house clean for once in their lives and admittedly, it wasn’t going very well.

“There’s a fucking raccoon down in the basement.”

“Oh, Rabie?” Albert asked, chuckling. “Yeah, I know, saw her last time I was down there.”

“You named her _Rabie_?” Race stared at his boyfriend, astounded. “I- How long has she been there, what the hell?”

“Oh, I don’t know, a while. Maybe a couple weeks. She’s really nice, though, promise.” Albert smiled at him, somehow not at all affected by the fact that a rabid animal had been living in their house.

Race was desensitized. “You did laundry last week down there, how- We need to get her out.”

“Well, we can’t, she has rabies. If you get rabies you die.”

“Alright, I- Okay.” Race sighed, sitting down on the couch. “So what do we do, then, call someone?”

He glared at the redhead, confused as he started to chuckle, grinning to himself. “We’ll have to do what you should’ve done years ago, Tonio.” He smirked. “Go get our rabies shots.”

Race groaned as they sat down at the waiting room. He didn’t like the hospital, it smelled like weird medicine and hand sanitizer and it reminded him of big pointy machines and needles and lots of other things he’d rather not think about. In fact, he was convinced that whoever designed hospitals had the concept ‘scary and empty’ in mind. It made the hair on his arms rise, they always looked like some type of weird laboratory, they were too plain and too pale, if that even made sense. Well, it did, in his mind. He could hear some machine beeping from one of the rooms and some low chatter from a group of teens waiting outside the ER (which, hey, he’d been there) but despite that, it was quiet, almost unnaturally so. He scooted closer to his boyfriend, taking in a deep breath.

“Hey, you ok?” Albert said, reaching for his hand.

“I fucking hate the hospital.” Race frowned. “And shots are scary and… pinchy.”

“Hey, I know.” Albert smiled at him, and Race felt some of his blood finally return to his face. “But we had to do this, eventually, you don’t wanna get rabies and die.” Race nodded, he supposed Albert was right, he’d postponed this enough already. “Well, assuming you don’t already have rabies, remember that time you bit me?”

“Which one?” Race grinned.

“Exactly.” As Albert said that, the door opened and a woman stepped out. “We’re next, you’re good to go?”

Race sighed, nodding as the two stood up, walking into the room where the doctor greeted them. Race hated hospitals.

Race pouted the entire way home as he drove, his grip tight on the steering wheel.

“Hey, come on, that wasn’t that bad.” Albert smiled at him. “I bet it doesn’t even hurt right now.”

“…Well, it doesn’t.” He admitted. “But it did for one second! It was terrible!” He protested, frowning when he heard Albert laugh from the passenger seat. “Hey, don’t laugh at me! I’m in pain!”

“Oh, quit whining.” Albert rolled his eyes, the fond smile still on his face. “We still have a rabid raccoon to take care of, in case you forgot.”

“I didn’t, and that’s your fault, by the way. You encouraged her.” Race turned to look at the ginger.

“Whatever you say.” Albert just laughed in response. “Now, eyes on the road, Bitch Blonde, I just dodged death by rabies and would rather not die in a car crash.”


End file.
